June Notes: 8 Things I'm Learning About Living Well
A few reflections on healing, ambition, identity, community, and paying closer attention to what makes a good life.
I used to think living well was something you achieved.
A destination. A reward. A state of arrival.
It looked like having the right job, the right habits, the right body, the right relationship, the right routine. It looked like becoming the kind of person who had finally figured life out.
The older I get, the less convincing that idea becomes.
Living well feels less like arriving and more like…paying attention.
It’s noticing what nourishes you and what depletes you. Becoming honest about what your life is doing to your body, your mind, your relationships, and your spirit. It’s accepting that some lessons can only be learned slowly.
As June unfolds, these are a few things I find myself returning to.
1. Your body keeps score of the life your mind is trying to ignore
For a long time, I thought resilience meant pushing through.
Now? I’m beginning to see that the body is often the first part of us to tell the truth.
Stress becomes fatigue. Grief becomes tension. Burnout becomes illness. Anxiety becomes sleeplessness.
Sometimes the symptoms are not the problem. They are the messenger.
Living well requires listening before the whisper becomes a scream.
2. The difference between ageing well and ageing poorly is often community
When we think about health, we often think about nutrition, exercise, supplements, and sleep.
All important.
But increasingly, I am convinced that relationships deserve equal attention.
Who checks in on you?
Who knows when you’re not okay?
Who celebrates your wins?
Who tells you the truth?
A meaningful life is rarely built alone. Neither is a healthy one.
Build your people.
3. Not every season is for acceleration
There is so much pressure to be building, scaling, growing, producing, and achieving.
But life moves in seasons.
Some seasons are for planting.
Some are for harvesting.
Some are for resting.
Some are for healing.
The mistake is assuming they should all look the same.
Growth is not always visible. Sometimes the most important work happens underground.
4. Achievement can change your circumstances. It cannot tell you who you are
Achievement is a wonderful servant and a terrible identity.
Careers change. Platforms grow and shrink. Titles come and go.
If your sense of self is built entirely on what you do, life eventually becomes exhausting.
I’ve spent much of my adult life collecting achievements. Many of them opened doors I am grateful for (including an incredible health education event I was on a panel for last year).
None of them answered the deeper question of who I am.
That question requires a different kind of work.
5. Peace isn’t something you find. It’s something you practice
I used to imagine peace as a destination.
Something waiting on the other side of the next milestone.
But peace has often appeared in much smaller places.
In prayer.
In gratitude.
In silence.
In choosing not to react immediately.
In accepting what I cannot control.
Peace is less about finding the perfect circumstances and more about cultivating a way of being.
6. Healing often looks less impressive than ambition
Healing rarely receives applause.
Nobody congratulates you for setting a boundary.
Nobody gives awards for going to therapy.
Nobody posts celebratory announcements about getting more sleep, taking medication, grieving properly, or saying no.
Healing can look painfully ordinary.
But some of the most courageous decisions we make are the ones that help us become whole.
Choose it anyway.
7. You cannot think your way into a rested life
This one feels particularly personal.
There are seasons where I become convinced that the solution to exhaustion is better planning, better systems, better productivity.
Sometimes the solution is simply rest.
Not optimised rest.
Not earned rest.
Just rest.
The body has needs that cannot be negotiated with forever.
At some point, you have to stop.
8. The version of you beneath the roles deserves your attention too
Doctor.
Writer.
Creator.
Partner.
Friend.
Daughter.
Leader.
Most of us carry many identities.
The danger is forgetting there is still a person underneath them all.
A human being who existed before the achievements, responsibilities, expectations, and labels.
Living well requires making time to meet that person again.
To ask what they enjoy.
What they need.
What they believe.
What makes them alive.
Perhaps some of the deepest work we do is learning how to return to ourselves.
As I write this, I don’t feel like someone who has mastered any of these lessons.
I’m learning them.
Slowly.
Imperfectly.
Often repeatedly.
But maybe that is what living well actually is.
Not mastery.
Attention.
The willingness to keep noticing what matters.
Thanks for reading.
Here are a few things I’m paying attention to this week.
The Conscious Edit
Reading:
The Comfort Crisis by Michael Easter
Listening:
Inhale/Exhale by Christopher Galovan, Aardie
Reflecting:
“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” — Simone Weil
A small thing bringing me back to myself lately:
Writing a ‘Gratitude List’ every evening, of 10 things i’m grateful for that day.
Happy new month!
Until next time,
Sanaa